The Last Four Months

I don't have any excuse for four months of blogging negligence. All I can say is you may understand once I'm done with this update (or some may call it an illustrated novel). I will do my best to keep things in chronological order from past to present, but I want to start first with the most recent of events. My nephew was born Friday, September 28th to my brother Nate and sister(in-law) Robin. Nathanial Michael Banks was four months old but never got to live outside of his mother's womb. I called Nate randomly Tuesday the 24th to ask him something and he told me that Robin was going in for more testing as they could not find a strong heartbeat on the ultrasound. I went home and started to pray. I pussyfooted around for a while not sure what exactly to pray for. Then I started to pray for a heartbeat. I prayed that the doctors (as awesome and capable as they are) made a mistake and there had been a strong heartbeat the entire time. I prayed for a while, I don't know how long, face down in my living room. I spent the next few hours in and out of a continuing prayer for my unborn nephew's life. My dad called that evening and it was a short call. Their baby had died. I hung up and cried. Sean, Melissa and Robin (my roommates) eventually got back and I didn't really feel like hanging out. So, being 1,200 miles away from where I wanted to be I went down the street to a bar and took strong advantage of their happy hour. I never asked God why it happened, because I believe He did everything He was supposed to do, and it is unknown factors of the human side of the world that causes these things to happen. I did wonder why He chose not to fix Nathaniel's heart (or abdomen as I now understand), because it wouldn't be any stretch to His capabilities. I write all this because it was my honest reaction to the news, and because I just read Robin's blog for the first time in a little while. If you want to understand full strength and faithfulness in God and His ways, please read Nate 'n' Robbiesue. It's strengthened and affirmed my appreciation for God's gift of family to us. At times I hate being so far away from my family, but I talked to Nate yesterday and felt really close to him. He even gave me brotherly advice :) Nathanial Michael's funeral was Tuesday, Oct. 2nd. I wish I could have been there. Don't really know what else to say at this point, except that I'm proud of them. Nate and Robin really seemed to have been strengthened by it. I love you all, and I love you Nate and Robin.

(So, this wasn't the illustrated novel I promised. Long story short, I moved to Denver. Click here to view the new chapter of my life)